Finished the requisite quantity of Ex. Rec. and read a little of geography before
breakfast, and was pretty studiously employed upon law, after which I took two hours
of leisure, and went over the river. After dinner I rode to Bladensburg with John.
This was one of my deeply melancholy days in which I look upon life as a thing in
no respect capable of producing happiness to me. My God! The ideas which I have upon
this subject are almost too dreadful to hint at. But I know most certainly that they
produce deep misery to me. A short time may discover all. No letter from Abby yet,
what can be the case with her; there lies the cause of all this feeling. My God! the trial is almost too severe.